I say for either of us because although I might not use that idiom, it certainly applies to me. I am very much someone who has to be forced into the limelight, I do not naturally seek that attention out.
What's the point of this?
In terms of self-authorship, the point is to take people at their word. They know their personalities best. Listen to them. Don't be surprised when all of a sudden they start acting as they told you they would.
This friend, well within a couple of years they started flying under the radar even from me. They might claim they weren't but they were. It was too obvious to see. I was surprised and tried to fight that tendency, but it didn't work. They would just fly further and further under the radar.
(don't even ask about this second image. . . . strangely enough it popped up when I searched flying under the radar in google!)
I was surprised to say the least, and disappointed too. But I shouldn't have been. They were acting out who they were. They weren't able to live any other way. I should have expected it if only because they had told me that was their natural tendency.
What was frustrating was that they kept claiming that they didn't mean to be so guarded and distant. They might not want it, but that was who they are. It's like asking someone with red hair to have blonde. it doesn't work. The hair might change for a short time, you might be able to dye it and hide it for a bit, but eventually, that red hair will start growing again.
I should have realized that the time when they were NOT flying under the radar was an anomaly. I should have expected them to start flying low on me soon enough. I should have listened and prepared myself better.
The self-authorship point? In the future, I will listen to what people tell me about themselves, and believe them. Even expect to see it from them. They know themselves best. Listen and predict.
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